Not a blog

Kie vi naskiĝis? / Where were you born?

2011-04-20T17:24:00.001+03:00

Kie vi naskiĝis? / Where were you born?

Answer here

New blog

2009-06-25T00:20:00.001+03:00

I set up a new blog.

Italian Job

2009-04-12T15:07:00.005+03:00

Howzit! It's a Sunday afternoon, and I'm forcing myself to type a post. The reason for this is that otherwise I'd have to watch the Gladiator. (LOL) Indeed!

There's this new (gay) place in town, called the Italian Job. We went there last night for the third or fourth time, and it was full of gay guys. I felt a bit, umm, uncomfortable, I suppose. Chrissy and I were the only women there. She didn't feel uncomfortable or anything, though.

If you're a gay woman, do you feel uncomfortable, or out of place, in a club full of gay guys? Why? Why not?

Chrissy is chasing me. I better go!

Sorry - This is it!

2009-03-04T18:11:00.006+02:00

I haven't written a blog post in a while, and for that I'm sorry! Well, I haven't written too many blog posts in my life, but I will try to make up for it. In fact, I'll try to write posts and maybe do some videos as well.

So, where to begin... Ah, well, I'm in South Africa now. Life's been treating me well. In fact, things could not be better. OK - financially, maybe! I'm living with my dear girlfriend, Christina (and her mom, by the way), whom I've given my heart to (Christina - not her mom). There is talk of marriage, and if it weren't for the lousy financial situation...

I'm glad I'm with Christina now. Though I've been missing home, I'm not going back anytime soon. It could be never. This is my home now. Of course, I wish I could be in contact with my friends and family more, but since I don't have an internet connection yet (well, Christina has a wireless one that she takes with her to work), I'm unable to be in contact as often as I would like. Also, the phone bill would not look very nice if I were to call my mom every day.

I miss my hobbies, too. I'd like to get back to playing table hockey, but I don't see that happening in the near future. People here, in South Africa, don't play table hockey - their loss! I've found myself missing playing guitar, too. Luckily, Christina had an old acoustic guitar I could play. I just wish I had someone to play with. Christina, maybe? If she could still play piano.

Right now, I'm pretty happy. There are a lot of things I had to leave behind - some I had to abandon forever - but I feel I did the right choice. Actually, there was no choice. This had to happen, and I'm glad it did. Now, I just wish I had a job. Oh, and an education. Most importantly, though, I have love.

P.S. I finally finished reading Christina's book, Demonspawn. If you're into science fiction (or gay books), you should read it!

Portrait Meme

2008-09-23T02:28:00.002+03:00

Portrait Meme
Originally uploaded by Suvi-Tuuli Mäki-Asiala

Instructions:
Take a picture of yourself right now. Don't change your clothes, don't fix your hair - just take a picture.
Post that picture with NO editing.
Post these instructions with the picture.

Idea by Mark Atwood: Portait Meme

I have moved

2008-09-21T01:24:00.003+03:00

Hiya! I no longer live in Oulu. My new address is at Kannustie 56, 69300, Toholampi, Finland. At least for the next two months. I'm going to try to find a job. Know a place I could fine one?

I'm going to have to sell a lot of stuff. My 23 inch Samsung monitor, for example. I've a lot of debt, and I need money for the plane ticket to South Africa. Why am I going there? Because the love of my life lives there. Good enough reason?

I'm going to continue drinking, listening to music, and chatting. Hope you all have a wonderful time, whether it's day or night where you live! I feel happy, although that move took a lot out of me. Good night!

Edit: What is this MeeID thing anyway? Well, mine is www.meeid.com/tuuli/

Floppy

2008-09-16T12:44:00.001+03:00

Floppy
Originally uploaded by Suvi-Tuuli Mäki-Asiala

I got this bunny from Christina. Isn't it cute? I sleep with this bunny every night. Her name is Floppy, by the way, and I love her! Not as much as I love Christina, but still. I feel like such a baby, hehe!

Just a few thoughts...

2008-09-09T12:10:00.004+03:00

I'm out of money, I'm out of luck. Well, at least money. I've lately been sad, happy - a bit of both. Not a long ago, I found the love of my life. She's my soulmate, my sweet Christina. She seems perfect for me in so many ways. She's the reason I'm happy. Now to the sad part. My mother doesn't seem to be too happy that I've found someone, because that someone happens to be a girl. She wasn't too happy to hear about our plans for marriage, either. sigh!

The other thing making me a bit sad is the fact that after three years of struggling, I've still not managed to finish any of my courses at university. Yeah, I know! What a serious loser! And, to top that, I've started to have doubts about this really being the thing I want to do. I guess it is, but what if it's not? How can I really know? I've wanted to be a programmer since I was twelve. Oh, for crying out loud! I'm a real mess, aren't I? lol

I can make a pretty good mess. I'm disorganized, never on time, and can't make my own damn mind even if my life depended on it. Well, I can make my mind, but just not when it's about my own life. ;) I so need a drink right about now. That'd be the final layer on the cake made of shit called my life. lol The only thing really keeping my head above the water is Christina. I'm so very much in love. <3

Help us!

2008-08-30T21:41:00.000+03:00

We Are Desperate! Help Us To Get Married!!

2008-08-29T23:11:00.001+03:00

We met on Facebook, Christina & I, and fell madly in love. We are trying to get married, but need your help. Please, consider a small contribution. Join our Facebook group. http://ping.fm/V5TsL

I have a girlfriend!

2008-08-24T00:14:00.003+03:00

I have finally found someone! She's funny, smart, and beautiful. Her name is Christina, she's from South Africa, and is 12 years older than I am, but I'm very much in love with her and the distance between us is nothing. Thanks to the modern wonders of computers and the internet, I've been able to chat with her since last saturday. Yes, we've only known for that long, although it feels like forever. We are both very much in love and hope to get married soon. We've talked about moving in together, but she has a sick mother whom she's taking care of. I'm so happy to have found my soulmate, the love of my life. I love you, Chrissy!

Technorati Claim

2008-07-18T10:25:00.001+03:00

Technorati Profile

I'm Alone

2008-07-08T01:35:00.002+03:00

There are so many things I've been thinking about lately; what will my future be like, will I ever find someone to love, will I ever be able to accept the fact that I'm different. These are questions all people ask at times. I also have some unique problems - or at least they are unique from a straight persons perspective, but I'm not straight.

One thing that has been on my mind is the question many transsexual people ask: will I ever be able to pass? Currently, when I look myself in the mirror I see something that is not a woman. That mirror image is supposed to be me, but it doesn't feel like me. Passing is very important to me, very important. I'd do anything to get surgery to fix my face. I feel so ugly.

Another thing is infertility. Because of hormones, I'm pretty much infertile. I didn't want to freeze my sperm - ugh, sounds strange; my sperm - but now I have second thoughts. Should I have done it before I started on hormones? I know it feels weird, the thought of being someones dad, but I'd still want children that were my own. I do hope that someday medicine has advanced to point that I can get pregnant.

Third thing that has been bothering me is my friends, and how they act around me, how they talk about me. Actually, most of my friends are heterosexual males. You can imagine what that can be like. They don't really think of me as a woman, but I'm starting to feel like I'm not part of the group anymore. Do I even want to be one of the boys?

So, as you can see, I have many things on my mind lately. This is just a list of the things that bother me the most. I'd really like to know what to do, but I don't even have the energy to do much anything. I used to live inside my mind, in an imaginary world, but I can't do that anymore since I'm an adult now. Life is so complicated sometimes.

Hello, world!

2008-06-30T13:41:00.001+03:00

This is just a test.